Once upon a time long long ago a 7th grade C was hanging out in her bff S's bedroom. S and C loved to talk about grown up stuff. Sex, boys, blow jobs, you name it. Well, this particular day we were talking about boobs. At this point I had the boobs that I would carry into my adulthood and S was still growing hers. (They grew in quite nicely. ;) Love you, lucky bitch.)
She then told me about this little trick you can do to see if your boobs are sagging. Bend over with your shirt lifted, lift your boobs up, place a pencil under them and then stand up. If the pencil falls you are blessed with perky tits. If the pencil stays under your boobs then you are not so blessed. We both decided to try this out and were elated when our 7th grade boobs did us right and the pencils fell to the floor.
Fast forward to last night. Stupid, stupid C decided to try out the boob test after her shower. Sure and shit the damn pencil stuck. PENCIL TEST = BIG FAT FAIL! WTF. I had an inkling that my once perky B cup boobs were not so perky as they were pre pregnancy but stupid C thought, why not see how NOT perky they are. UGH!
Please bow your heads and say a little prayer for my boobs. They lived a long beautiful life. May they rest in peace. Amen.